A rant about teachers

Today, I'd like to discuss teachers and teaching.

In Carmenland, there is no tenure. (We'll discuss labor unions at another time, but pay attention, because it will be the same idea.) No one is guaranteed a job because they show up and are able to breathe. You have to perform and you will keep your job based on a measure of that performance. Like the rest of the world. You are not special just because you have been at the same school for 3 years. You get seniority because you EARN it.

There's a novel concept.

In Carmenland, teachers will get paid much more than they do now. They will be paid based on performance, level of education and ongoing training, and testing. Yes, I said testing. Every teacher will undergo testing every 5 years. They will be tested on their subject matter focus, issues facing teaching/children, learning styles of children, lesson plans, etc. All very measurable and objective. If you don't get good performance reviews, you don't show initiative in the classroom and don't do well on your 5-year testing, you are OUT OF A JOB. Just like everyone else. You are going to have to WORK at keeping your job. You can't just show up every day and say the same thing over and over 7 times and slip on through the system.

Now, before you get your teaching panties in a wad, let's discuss compensation.

Teachers will START at $40K, out of school with a bachelor's degree. You can't teach if you can't get a bachelor's degree. If you have a Master's degree, that's automatically $60K, and if you have a doctorate, you will start at $80K. And it has to be a doctorate that matters. It can't be in something stupid, like philosophy. We are not going to pay you for having an opinion and being passionate about it. That's what philosophy is. You have to get a graduate degree in some subject that has WRONG answers. In life, not every answer is right.

Your compensation will increase based on your performance reviews (which are yearly), the number of ongoing education classes you take, and your testing. Bonuses are awarded yearly based on innovative teaching, going the extra mile, and being overall exemplary. These are awarded by the principal.

Principals will start at $100K per year, and will be measured on the school's success. How do they do at 4H competitions? Band and choral competitions? Scholar's bowl? The school must be well-rounded as well as academic. The 3 R's are not all there is in life. We need to nurture the other side of the brain, too. SAT scores are important and they won't be ignored, but they also won't stand in the vacuum.

Money for schools will increase greatly in Carmenland because of the taxation on tabacco and alcohol. 100% of these taxes will go to education. Parents are not going to have to buy papertowels and hand sanitizer for the classroom.

The nation will go to a more year-round school. There will be a few weeks in the summer, a few weeks in the fall, a few weeks in the spring and a healthy break around the holidays. No months off at a time. It breaks the rhythm of learning and is burdensome for parents who work, which is most of them. There will be plenty of time during these yearly breaks to vacation, so that is not an argument. All school districts will set their own calendar, so everyone's break times will be naturally staggered.

Teachers will get paid for what they do - spend 8 hours a day with our children, many of whom are raw, undisciplined, spoiled brats.