What on earth and what is next?
"Welcome to the Baby Reveal Party! Come to City Medical Center for Carmen's scheduled C-Section and welcome Baby Boy Sam in person! Disposable cameras and barf bags available."
Is there nothing sacred between the parents anymore? Oh! Know! Here is a great idea:
"Please join us as we try to conceive! Jim and Carmen have been tracking basal temperatures for months and think the time is right to make a baby! Come celebrate this beautiful act of love between a man and woman as we mix Carmen's Eggs with Jim's Baby Gravy. Refreshments and cigarettes afterward."
Who on earth has these parties? I will tell you who. The same parents who have two photographers at their child's first birthday: one to snap candids and one to snap poses. The parents who have three cakes at the aforementioned party: One to freeze, one to have the toddler dig into for pics, and one to serve to the guests. Hopefully, the latter cake has several tiers because there will be at least 75 guests. And don't forget the take-home gifts. After all, what is a birthday party without the birthday parents thanking everyone for coming by giving each guest a bag of goodies to take home.
Lord have mercy.
Like has very few good surprises. Most surprises suck to the max. The gender of a newborn baby is one of life's best surprises. Can you not have two names at the ready? Do you have to have all of the monogramming done pre-birth? Can you not clothe your newborn in yellow or green? Can you not keep anything at all private?
For the love of all that is sacred! Have people over to your home for pizza or a movie! You don't need a freaking gender-reveal party. That is setting a dangerously high precedent.
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